Monday, April 16, 2012

Scary Mary, quite contary why do you ♥ headbands so?




Having a bad hair day?




Boxed Perm
I've been rocking my natural locks for about three years now, and the journey has been filled with challenges.  I can't say that I will never go back to the creamy crack (what Afro American women refer to as the boxed perm), but I don't see any signs of doing so in my future.  I'm quite satisfied with the way I can style my hair in it's natural state and to my surprise it's more manageable.  That is until...the "Little Bad Hair Day Imp" decides to show up.




My hair had been in a twist-out style for 3 days.  I was hoping Sunday would make day four, thus saving me time to not really have to style my hair after getting dressed.  Nice thought, but it was an EPIC TWIST-OUT FAIL!  I fell asleep after watching the movie "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" (great movie by the way) and did not secure my hair in a scarf.  So...I woke up the next morning to this Scary Mary moment.  EEKKKK!


Really?...What am I suppose to do with this mess!

Using headbands in your hair when rocking natural hairstyles is so fashionably cute.  It can take any style from twists, locs, the Afro puff or Bantu Knots and make it look fantabulous!  Some of my BEST hair days have been accomplished from the trusty head band.  The question was though...would I, could I...be able to create a miracle with this bird's nest?  Well, I am a  believer in miracles, and after all it was Sunday.  


First things first, I knew a half-way up-do style was definitely in order, so I needed to clean up the kitchen.  (kitchen – noun. the hair at the nape of the neck that tends to be difficult to straighten.)  Sista girl lingo for shape-up the neckline.  

Ewww...its been a minute huh?


Okay, now I needed a brush, a knee-hi stocking, gel and must not forget the H20.








I wet the brush lightly, because I wanted an textured up-do not a frizzy puff ball.  Applied some gel around the edges of my hairline and brushed upward.  Then tied the knee-hi stocking around my head and tighten while pulling the ends of my hair until I got to the desired position.  



Still looking like Scary Mary you say?  LOL



Time for my miracle working moisturizing lotion.


Only needed about a quarter size amount to work through the scalp and ends of my hair.  Any more than that and I would have ended up with a cotton top up-do.  After getting the moisturizer all worked through, I put on a black headband (the ouch-less kind of course) and finger styled my do.  ...And wah-la!


Not bad after my inital Scary Mary moment.

The side.
When you have a limited amount of time on your hands, headbands can be a lifesaver (they are for me).
Profile ~ This is why I headbands!





Friday, April 6, 2012

Put Your Big Girl Panties On and Deal With It!



I have been going through a rough patch here lately and stopped blogging for a few weeks.  What's the deal-ee-oh?...well the story goes a little something like this ~




 
Has life ever thrown you a curve ball?  Something happens that you would never expect.  I guess that's the whole point of calling the "unexpected" a curve ball...huh?  Well life threw me a SUPER DUPER CURVE BALL with a note attached:  SURPRISE! ~ Heeeeere's Daddy! 





 



My father whom I have not seen since the age of 2 yrs. old, after what he says has been an exhausting search has found me.  Where as I should have been slightly elated about this I was not.  One of the reasons being is because since I can remember, all I ever heard were negative things about my father from my mother, and other relatives close to me.  These comments were so heavily ingrained in my mind that by the time I was old enough to decide if I wanted to look for my father...I didn't.  I really had no desire in knowing him and have never felt a true "absence", because I grew up with 2 male cousins, a grandfather and 3 uncles who took on the image of a "father figure" gracefully.  However, the man that I spoke with on the phone does not come close to the description projected by my family.  This man claiming to be my father is educated, well-spoken, seems to be sincere, and really an all around well-rounded individual.  This has me quite baffled to say the least.  Since speaking with my father on the phone three weeks ago I've gone from feelings of utter shock, to anger and sheer depression.  Other than the sudden death of my Mom 11yrs. ago, nothing has rocked my entire being to the point of uneasiness, until now.




I have spoken with my father about 4 times since our initial conversation.  At the end of each phone call my estranged father of 30 something years says a very endearing "I love you."  Wow!...how do I ever respond to this?  What do I say to him?  I'm trying to give him a chance, although this situation is a little forced and uncomfortable for me. The thing is I don't love him, at least not yet.  On the real!...I don't even know him, or trust him so how can I possibly love him.?  I know in my heart that if a relationship is to develop the past will have to stay in the past and we will have to begin building in the present.  However, before I can move on there are some hard questions that need to be asked and I need time to digest the answers.



My husband and I decided that we as a family will go visit and meet my father for the first time Memorial Day weekend.  So, we'll see how it goes.  I'm very good at reminding others to "go with the flow" and to "live in the now."  However, I will just as quickly admit doing so is easier said than done.  As I come to terms with the curve ball life has thrown my way the prayer below will follow me on this journey as I get to know the man who is my father:



Dear God,

Errors are merely the stepping stones to the path of righteousness. We will not know what is right before we know what is wrong. Knowing what is wrong can be obtained by learning from other/s or experiencing it ourselves. This is the spiritual generosity empowered by Love, and this in return will empower our loved ones to live righteously the next time.  At the same time being generous in love will make us more like Christ, and spiritually stronger and closer to God...Amen

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